Unfortunately I’ve not been so well recently (nice opening huh!). I suffer quite badly with IBS and have been experiencing one of the worst bouts yet. It’s lasted around three weeks and counting. I lost quite a bit of weight and ended up weak, dizzy and dehydrated, with a general sense of just feeling like absolute shit. The joys of a dicky tummy. But summer is on it’s way and I can feel my spirits lifting with the temperatures every day.
After the insanely positive response to my post about being emotionally distant I decided to address some of the factors that were easily adjusted. I decided to be more open, more trusting and to try and let go of control once in a while to see how it felt and whilst I wouldn’t say I’m a changed person, I am seeing new sides to myself. Most of the time I just feel a lot more exposed but I am enjoying aspects of this slightly softer Rhi.
Recently I’ve found myself falling back in love with old passions like writing and photography. I’m filling up notebooks with scribbles and seeing things around me again that I had stopped noticing for a while. Small details that used to captivate me are jumping out again. It’s nice. I decided to give Instagram another try (both @maltagram and @movingonupaway), after getting fed up of the harassment and dick pics. Still not sure I’m really ready but it’s such a shame to give up something I love because of a few fucking weirdos.
Now summer is on it’s way I’m excited about late night swims and sunset picnics. Every summer I want to fit in as many as possible and every summer something else gets in the way so I hope I can do more of what I love this year. I’m realising it’s important to take time for what you want to do and not get side tracked, caught up in work or overcome by laziness.